By Hans Ebert

THE DARK SIDE OF HONG KONG NIGHT LIFE 1

Video killed the radio star and looking at the number of “lifestyle” channels coming on stream in Hong Kong shows that the lemmings are back with a vengeance and a monkey see, monkey do attitude. Let’s just hope that none of these new channels being launched are nothing like that shocking example of tediousness and pointlessness produced by HKTVB that is La Dolce Vita.

However, knowing the calibre of creative talent available in Hong Kong and who seem to have a monopoly when it comes to producing these visual cattle cakes, don’t be surprised if the new LKF Channel is another example of wallpaper advertising disguised as programming. That is, if the LKF Channel ever sees the light of day.

DUMBER 1

From everything we know, those behind this channel who have job-hopped from one job to gig to the next and with no home runs between them, unless one considers FashionTV a success, they’re not the most communicative of professionals. And we use the word “professionals” with great reservations.

DUMBER 2

A number of companies and people who have been filmed by the fledgling channel months ago are still waiting to see their content on the channel. Good luck.

DUMBER 3

We were introduced to two key executives with the channel by a third party via email. We had never heard of an LKF Channel and wondered what it could be. A reality series based around the comings and goings at the 7-11, the once trendy areas most successful business? After a couple of polite emails all we heard when asking to get together was a roaring silence. In fact it was only after one of these executives received a message mentioning we were waiting for some form of an answer- and to which the executive replied, “Who are they?”- and after being reminded, came a quick response. It was an answer so transparently full of obvious excuses, we blanched. Little people, you cannot play these silly games with us without embarrassing yourselves and coming across as not very smart flim flam men.

DUMBER 4

Sorry, but we don’t have the slightest intention of meeting up and wasting our time on some lame channel that looks headed straight for the scrap heap. When will these geniuses behind channels like this realise that content is king and that having a channel no one watches went out of fashion with all those oddities produced by veteran television man Robert Chua? At least, Robert Chua had email etiquette.

DUMBER 5

LKF Channel looks like going the way of LKF Tower, the building that houses a series of over the top and over-ambitious venues that appear to have a problem attracting business.

DUMBER 6

Staying with the subject of flops, a Phoenix is trying desperately to flap its wings and rise from the ashes. That-larger than-life character named Michel Adam, pictured below, and the Big Daddy Amin of what was once FashionTV before he and his channel mysteriously disappeared from view after all those high profile FTV parties on the channel’s cruise liner featuring Eastern European models as click bait, the opening of FTV-branded clubs and Adams’ extravagant Wolf Of Wall Street lifestyle, is apparently trying to make a comeback, and is in the hunt for Red October and new investors. Don’t worry, Michel, there will always be some idiot from the Philippines wanting to pay big bucks to be in the company of Eastern European models. If not, there’s always the clown prince and brother of the Sultan of Brunei. There’s a rich sucker born every minute.

DUMBER 7

Though we have always found Michel Adam to be highly entertaining and a great host, we would never ever wish to get involved in any business dealings with him, and can only wish him the best of luck.

DUMBER 7b

Perhaps he, the LKF Channel and “celebrity chef” Harlan Goldstein should pool their talents together and become a marriage made in con carne heaven with just a soupçon of hype and bollocks?

DUMBER 8