THE DARK SIDE OF HONG KONG NIGHT LIFE 1

If those geniuses running music companies in Asia- and very often, running them into the ground- took time out to figure out the consistent and fan following for Blur, Oasis and Suede, they- and concert promoters- might just be onto something.

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For over a decade, these bands can tour Singapore, perhaps China, and, especially Hong Kong, and sell out. What’s the secret? A back catalogue of hits so that as long as Damon Albarn, Brett Anderson, or either of the Gallagher brothers are fronting whatever bands and performing “Song 2”, anything off Suede’s “Coming Up”, or “Wonderwall” or any of their radio friendly hits, nothing else matters. In fact, hit any club in Hong Kong with one of those ubiquitous covers bands morphing themselves into whoever are crowd pleasers, and there is absolutely no doubt that “Wonderwall ” will be performed replete with that Liam Gallagher sneer before the singer next channels Axl Rose, Springsteen and, well, Amy Winehouse.

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A bright and breezy Damon Albarn in HK with our old mate saxophonist Blaine Whittaker

While promoters are vying to bring in either one or both of the Gallagher brothers for another tour of Asia, in Hong Kong on August 23 at Asiaworld is Imagine Dragons, the American alternative rock band, that has steadily built up a following and an act, despite not having any Britpop legacy, this region will be seeing more often.

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Meanwhile, one hears a Suede revival band is on its way while we really have to wonder what on earth those old men in Spandau Ballet are doing also playing here in August.

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As for Hong Kong audiences only wanting to hear the hits and not exactly being purists, the very old boys club that is the Foreign Correspondents Club has, for years, brought out blasts from the very distant past every December with only one- maybe two- original members still ticking along. Over the years have been various incarnations of the Beach Boys who are now very old men, Credence Clearwater Revival, Steppenwolf, the Doobie Brothers and even got away last year with, dear gawd, the Jackson Four. No, FCC regular Michael Chugani is not booking the acts. He’s way too busy whingeing about noise pollution.

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LET’S BRING BACK THE HK$1.80 BOX LUNCH!

Here’s an idea for those behind the old Central Police Station project: Being a heritage building and one objective being to uphold the heritage of this former Big House on Old Bailey Street, why not bring back all those old Hong Kong restaurants like Czarina and Fernando’s Hideaway and the wonderful On Lok Yuen $1.80 box lunches with their original menus and made available at their original prices?

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Introduce this idea to Hongkers new generation of restless students, and it might even stop Michael Chugani banging on about the noise pollution going on at the Old Bailey Street site and which is keeping the old boy awake.

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ONLY IN HONG KONG

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A woman was jailed yesterday for three months and fifteen days for assaulting a police officer with her breast. Not two breasts, but one. The Fat Lady might not have sung as yet, however, as the judge who handed down the sentence- Deputy Magistrate Michael Chan Pik-kiu- is concerned about his safety after receiving threats. What? Booby is now coming after him with both barrels firing on all cylinders?

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Meanwhile, a married securities company director in Hong Kong stands accused of murdering and disposing of his mistress four years ago. One has a sneaky feeling that things are looking grim for the accused. Police report that CCTV footage shows him entering the building where the victim lived, staying for two hours, and then leaving, but returning with two bags. His Octopus Card record showed he bought a large storage bag, household gloves, a deodoriser and a box of screwdrivers. The next day, the accused was seen removing “a large and bulky chequered bag from the flat while, two days later, he asked decorators to clear everything out of the flat. Whaddaya think, people? Innocent?