Former trainer Andy Leung joins the Racing To Win panel and gives the Three Amigos no chance to speak.

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He also designs the team’s new wardrobe including glittering Lederhosen for everyone during Oktoberfest.

Tony Cruz shaves his head. We can’t think of any reason why he would other than sheer madness.

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The Japanese send their most unusual group of entries for the International Races in December.

Peter V’landys makes a pilgrimage to Hong Kong to bury the hatchet and for a photo opp with old “mate” Winfried Engelbrecht-Bresges.

Alas, EB has to attend an Aaron Kwok press conference and V’landys ends up having a photo opp with colorful owner Natalis Chan.

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Tony “Millie” Millard incurs the wrath of the Stewards by cycling around the Shatin paddock area wearing tight satin hot pants while waving and taking in the wolf whistles from the enthusiastic throng of punters as Macho Man is blasted around the course.

Perennial photo hoggers and dreadful bores Bennett Pang and Natalis Chan who were once in a band called The Loosers (we are not joking) manage to sneak into eleven winning photos without knowing any of the owners.

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Mikey Cyrus is mistakenly booked and repeats her hideous VMA’s performance at the Beer Garden during the night of the International Jockey Challenge.

Bill Nader, Director of Racing, is shocked at how Billy Ray Cyrus and his achy breaky heart has changed.

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In an unexpected move, Zac Purton becomes the retained jockey for the Sean Woods stable.

Not to be outdone and in a game of tit for tat, Dougie Whyte signs up with David Ferraris on an exclusive basis.

Wally Pyrah, resident raconteur and host at the HKJC Racing Club, leaves to accept the role once played by Sir Alec Guinness in the Star Wars franchise and regales Princess Leia with racing stories of yore.

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Wally Goes To Hollywood and guests on Keeping Up With The Kardashians- he offers advice on racing to Kim in a two-hour Special- and appears in the latest James Bond and Indiana Jones projects as a ventriloquist with magical storytelling powers plus becomes the new voice of Shrek.

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After tearing it down and rebuilding it, Angela Ho, Number 4 wife of ailing casino magnate Stanley Ho- and our Godfather- renames the Macau Jockey Club the Macau Casino and Jockey Club and brings together horse racing and baccarat, Big, Small and Cher.

Actually, it’s not such a stupid idea.

Angela Leong, wife of Macau tycoon Stanley Ho, poses with 1.5kg white truffle after Ho won the bid during an auction in Macau

Douglas Whyte announces that he has invested billions to create a revolutionary social media tool called Chirper where one can chirp messages to each other on their iPhones.

It’s actually Twitter, but no one dare say anything. Faaaark!

The Trainers Championship sees a titanic struggle for the premiership between Sean Woods and David Ferraris.

Both bring out their big guns for the final meetings- Autumn Gold and Affluence Of Rain.